It's amusing to try to understand our personality quirks...
One thing that I have often had is a best work friend, or confidante. When I learned that I had Huntington's Disease, I was employed at a special ed school in Chicago. The school was suffering from administrative difficulties, and the teachers and staff were very unhappy. One of my coworkers, Miss Pat, also became my confidante as we worked together to try to save the old ways that made that school so extraordinary. At that time, I had not even told my family about my positive gene test. They still thought that I had put the results "on hold." I told Miss Pat about HD, and she promised not to reveal the secret, and she kept that confidence for many years! Unfortunately I had to leave there suddenly, as we attempted to lead a mutiny against the principal. (But that is another story!).
My next confidante was Cheryl, who was a fellow employee at another job. I felt compelled to share my HD story with her, and she was willing to listen! Even though I am no longer employed there, we still share a camaraderie via phone calls. Other colleagues who had served as confidantes are my carpool friends from the Chicago Symphony Chorus. As we drove together for almost thirty years, we definitely shared many things. My carpool buddies knew about my decision to be tested in 2004, and gave me what support they could at that time.
In the cases where I didn't have a workplace confidante, when faced with difficulties, I tended to withdraw to my office, thus avoiding conversations with other teachers and students. This was not a healthy practice, and often led to new problems.
At my present position, I work fifteen hours a week doing music therapy with Alzheimer's patients. As a recipient of disability, I am only allowed to make a certain amount of money, but I was allowed to continue doing activities with the residents. When I applied for disability, I had to "come out of the HD closet," informing the administration at the retirement home about my situation. Since then, a few people have asked why I can't work more hours, but most of the other employees there just accept my situation. Two RA's have become confidantes, though, and have asked for more details about my condition. They have been both supportive and sympathetic!
